Posts
To stretch a short story long
The librarian of the Library of Liberty.
Based on a true story of a library-loving student
Once upon a time there was a library. Like all libraries which had a lot of unwanted books, this one too had a human-in-charge called a librarian. His job was to…Uh… actually, only he knew what he was doing there, because all those who sat in the Library of Liberty were busy sleeping, or else messaging their sweet hearts. Huge boards carrying jokes like ‘Maintain silence’ and ‘Do not use cell phones inside’ hung about in strategic locations in here, just like the Hutch ad hoardings outside. Remarkably, the students put an effort at following the former but were often caught disobeying the latter (“My hand feels empty without my phone”, as one shared with this author). Now, a noticeable quality of the librarian was that he had an eye for cell phones and caught keypad-happy users and reproached them loudly. I mean LOUDLY. Students who sat around watching this reality show, found this very frustrating, as the urge to restrain oneself to maintain silence was a trying task, which usually caused much fatigue.
Now what used to happen almost every single day was that, the student suffering a loss of his cell phone, as well as his dignity, would stand near the librarian’s desk (some one said that it was custom made for this purpose), awaiting the pleasantries that barged forth from the dutiful man of stacked books. At that time, a loud ring sounding like a phone from the 50’s would shake the whole library. Even the assistant librarian (Yes, there was one of them too), who kept her phone on silent mode would suffer temporary stoppage of her heart beat due to the suddenness of this phenomenon. Things would get worse as the Librarian, who would seem to suffer from immediate amnesia regarding the ‘No Cell phone inside” rule, would take out a Sony-Ericsson from his pocket and would begin to rap at 237 words/min at the rate of an estimated 95 Decibels, while communicating with an ignorant man on the other end of the phone (probably, a telemarketing executive).
Imagine this happening many times, everyday.
Naturally, couples who bunked classes together never found this sanctum of books as the ideal place for romance.
One day, the Librarians cell phone, cried yet again, as loud as it could. The pandemonium, beginning from the earth shattering ‘tring-tring’ repeated itself ending with a conversation which went as fast as BSNL broad band’s bit-rate*. As soon as he disconnected, a “We wish you a merry Christmas” ringtone blasted off from the students’ side of the library. The guilty ridden librarian, amidst the students’ muffled laughter, tried his hand at acting like a person who had forgotten his ear drums at home. The ring tone completed the chorus(“We wish…happy new year”) and died down, stopping short of the stanza (“Good tidings…”).
The Librarian resumed breathing.
Yet again, the book-man’s phone rang the sweet chiming-bell ringtone which resonated in the high roofed library. This time he showed considerable mastery of his skill to operate a mobile handset, and cut the call. A miracle.
As if in retaliation, “We wish you a merry Christmas” rang out again from the same student, the duration of which matched that of the Librarian’s sweet chiming Ericsson. Furiously, the book-monster charged towards his suspect who still seemed to think it was Christmas. He was just about to confiscate the lad’s mobile, when Ericsson started chiming again, from his desk, which was now around 20 steps away. With it crying like a hungry new-born, and knowing that he was going to lose the game, he yelled, “Give me the phone!”. The cheeky student who knew his moves smiled boldly, and replied “No”. All the eyes in the library moved from student to librarian to his desk. The chimes now reached a feverishly high pitch. Knowing that he was in quick sand, the Librarian attempted, “Come and give me the phone”, and leapt towards his desk in an attempt to silence the pandemonium. Identifying the call as an unavoidable one following a look at the screen, he picked it up. Immediately, the joy of Christmas pervaded the whole hall through a monophonic rendition of the now familiar Christmas song. The Librarian showed signs of not being able to concentrate on his conversation, and kept repeating a variety of “Hello”s amidst the din of the now fairly audible laughter of students who watched he “War of the Cell Phones”. The atmosphere of Christmas faded away and Mr. Book(ed)man , with much sweat dripping down his forehead (which confirmed family matters as the content of conversation), turned around to catch hold of the student who was bold enough to pull one on him.
But he had coolly walked away amidst the din.
With much weariness, Mr. books sat behind his desk. Sensing much distress, the assistant librarian approached him enquiring if he was alright and whether he needed some water.
“No”, he grunted, “Just show me how to switch this thing off.”
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
No comments:
Post a Comment