Has anyone felt alien among the people or culture one belongs to? Being n Kerala right now, I can’t help say that I feel that way. Although I belong to this state, I feel like I don’t belong here. I’m risking people’s wrath and ridicule when I say that because I have heard elders accuse people saying “ He went to Bangalore for some years and now he says he doesn’t belong here.” At the moment I don’t care. I am not shamed, mind you. But I don’t feel like this is my culture or this is the kind of people I want to be identified with. It doesn’t happen when I think of everyone, it just happens when I see the way the administration of the state is carried out, the state of affairs, the attitude of many people, some illogical customs, things which I call narrow-mindedness … I have a list. Many things are good here. At the same time a lot of things frustrate me. I just can’t imagine living here all my life. I envision a multi-cultural environment which is a little more broad-minded, at least, more than here.
This is not a utopian dream for a peaceful society. Just a feeling of alienation. This doesn’t mean that I feel like aI belong to Bangalore hundred percent. I just don’t feel like this is mine. The society around me. This feeling of ownership. Not at all. It’s at a Nadir. The lowest I have ever felt. This doesn’t mean that I don’t like the whole lot,. I like many, respect many and love many more. The set of people where I feel I belong to, feel that heart’s connection to themselves are Malayalees (people at church and youth league).
It was raining. Really bad. Surprisingly I never got irritated with it. I got wet. I was going for a wedding reception. Had to catch an auto to the venue. The seats and the driver and the whole machine was wet. Didn't want to wet my bottom, so I stood in the auto. Auto-wreck-show. വെറുതെ
It was great reading my pals' blogs on Sweden and their experiences in Norway. You live the life with them through the stories, especially because you can relate to all that they go through. a range of emotions come tumbling down, right from excitement, anxiety, jealousy, happiness, sadness of missing the place and people . . . It's great. Isn't it funny how just words written by someone where across the globe can evoke emotions in a person sitting miles away? That too just words, not even the person talking. An indelible mark by the person, somewhere. In this regard it is indirect, still it play with your emotions. Imagine the power of words when spoken directly. Psychology and social workers talk endlessly about the need to be careful of what one speaks, as it can have an unexpected effect on those listening. Especially children, as they grow up, when their personalities and conscience are being formed.
It's great to sit in a corner of the world and read a blog from among the millions up on the net.
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