The muse of the midnight

I am attending a camp today.

It's 1:23 am and I must sleep soon. But there! I opened a tab to create a new blog post. It is not because I am addicted, which I might become if my connection was an unlimited-use one, it is because, I feel the need to tweak the blog, or read through old mails, check out new apps on the web, specially when I have crossed the usage limit. I even postponed a chat with my relative/friend, stating that I had crossed the line ( the net-usage line, friends).

There is a thrill going beyond what you must not. I felt it even while I was flashing away on my father's scooter. You shouldn't go beyond 60 kmph, but I keep doing it. It's too slow otherwise, I feel. There is a thrill in going beyond what stops you. Does creativity spark better there? Do you learn more then?

A thrill need not be the right thing. It need not help you at all, beyond the momentary feeling of it. And surely, it displays a complete lack of discipline. An inability to restrain yourself.
Success in life also depends on self-control. where you curb your wish to indulge and tread the path to short-term happiness, if it is happiness at all.

Crash.

That's where your life will be , at the end of it.

Go to sleep.

A quiet time.

Joe sat down for a quiet time.

"Can you bring me some water?"

"Ok." He goes fetches water for his mother. He goes back and sits down to read again

"Turn the stove off, please."

He goes again. (Phew!)

He is back to sit and read one of those books which he suddenly found interesting and gets even more gripping every time he si called to do something.

"Open the gate", growls dad.

He fetches the keys and opens the gate. then he takes hold of his book again. You might find him lightly gritting his teeth. (Is it bending? Would I need braces?)

He sits with his book, yet again and nods his head from side to side realising his patience wearing away.

"Joe"

He keeps silent.

"Joe . . ."

The voice grows louder. Joe sits where he is pretending to read.

"Joe!"

A feeling of indignation in the voice heard from down stairs.

Silence.

Joe can't read anymore. He keeps the book down and goes to find out what the latest need is.

You can't do only what you like every day of your life. Sometimes, or many a times, you just have to do things you don't like doing. One of the reasons you need to, is that many people did that when you weren't ab;e to do it yourself. There was a lot of sacrifice behind what you are and where you are today.

( I owe it to them. I must.)

Joe's tired. But he'll answer the call, nonetheless.

Apologies

Hello,

I just wanted to apologise for the post "Jabber, when I hate it". My li'l sis raised a doubt- whether I was fine after reading that. The very next time I read it I was taken aback at the different ways in which that post could be read! What a danger. There was a even a reference which applied generally to girls ( which I noticed only the second time, because it was a comment on the person about whom the post was written), which sounded even chauvinistic and I take back all of that.
1. Counsellors ought to be more responsible.
2. You can't just put up a general statement without affecting people, even if unintended.
3. If you still say stuff like that, man, you ought to get a better grip of your life.

I apologise for the negative statement about women on the post and take it back. Kindly excuse me.

And thanks to li'l sis for making me think! Expecting the same in the future.

By the way, the person, whom the post was about, doesn't even know that this blog exists.

The answer will never be

Why?

Why did you appear?

It hurts.

But I do love you.

6 months isn't a too long a time to get to know and become friends.

I just like you.

But you hurt me.

I'll still be here.