The alien.

Has anyone felt alien among the people or culture one belongs to? Being n Kerala right now, I can’t help say that I feel that way. Although I belong to this state, I feel like I don’t belong here. I’m risking people’s wrath and ridicule when I say that because I have heard elders accuse people saying “ He went to Bangalore for some years and now he says he doesn’t belong here.” At the moment I don’t care. I am not shamed, mind you. But I don’t feel like this is my culture or this is the kind of people I want to be identified with. It doesn’t happen when I think of everyone, it just happens when I see the way the administration of the state is carried out, the state of affairs, the attitude of many people, some illogical customs, things which I call narrow-mindedness … I have a list. Many things are good here. At the same time a lot of things frustrate me. I just can’t imagine living here all my life. I envision a multi-cultural environment which is a little more broad-minded, at least, more than here.

This is not a utopian dream for a peaceful society. Just a feeling of alienation. This doesn’t mean that I feel like aI belong to Bangalore hundred percent. I just don’t feel like this is mine. The society around me. This feeling of ownership. Not at all. It’s at a Nadir. The lowest I have ever felt. This doesn’t mean that I don’t like the whole lot,. I like many, respect many and love many more. The set of people where I feel I belong to, feel that heart’s connection to themselves are Malayalees (people at church and youth league).