"You are dumb". "Oh, I am dumb!"

Why one will never be able to express oneself.
There are always restrictions. Some are self-imposed, some are external. It's only because you have to care for the feelings of others. You have the freedom of speech. But the tongue can be the most lethal weapon which inflicts psychological wounds which pierce the brain and stay there forever. Most times, what's said can't be taken back without a scar. It is true especially in the case of children according to studies. If they are taught that they are dumb, they grow up with the impression that they are dumb.

To the shores beyond

She called to say farewell

As she turned a new leaf;

'I want you to keep praying for me'.

The rails would take her

To the shores of a life new;

With the past behind her,

And faith like a mustard seed

With the forgiveness of

The merciful Father

She moves

To the shores beyond.

Fear grips her

My phone rings...

She pours her heart out

'I am scared, my dearest!'

But go she must -

To learn, to reflect

To further her horizons

To follow her heart's dreams

Away from the shackles that bound;

For a purposeful life

And with the Lord on her side

All she needs to do is,

Believe.

Easier said than done

For, a world of evil waits out there,

Seamless

She embarks on a new voyage

Given up her old self;

'I don't want mama crying

Nor my daddy's tears...

Though I am not close to them

I still love them'

(I just don't express)

Bags are being packed

Assurances are poured down

'When I think I can't handle it

I'll just give you a call,

How I wish you were there,

And I hope against hope ,

That you'll find work there.'

***

The phone calls lasted long

With stories on one end ,

Twisted with guilt and fear,

And on the other ,

A patient listening ear.

They went straight to my mind

Which said,

What a beautiful person now!

What a faithful heart!

How great a faith founded

A change that was made to last!

She gives me hope.

In a heart so tender

A faith that is yet slender

Still promising to stand by,

Her loving Saviour King.

'Your zeal for Him

Seems unmatchable',

Said I once; She replied,

'I've wronged,

But now I know God,

And I don't want to change,'

With a smile that melted my heart

Hearing the tender hearted faith

Of a real human being,

Who was once fallen on her knees

But now found hope.

Fear lingers

But I'll cheer her

As she completes every lap,

Fighting the dark knights

Of gossip and slander,

Dashing forward

With a zeal like never before,

To share the love and hope

Her Saviour's put in her heart

And one day she'll stand firm footed

Perhaps hand in hand,

With another tender hearted warrior

Embarking on another journey

To share what they received;

And I will still stand and cheer

The brave woman of faith

Who lived her all, His way

From the moment

The Lord touched her.

I will be here.

Riding the midnight as the bird touched down

My friend writes fantastically. As I read how he described our travel I felt, that's almost just how I experienced it, nearly there.
We had an adventurous ride, which happened only because he insisted. I had a goal, he made the way and we enjoyed together. That piece of prose lies here in his blog.
Some people have gifted friends.

The alien 2

I'm tired. Yet I see my perpective changin. I'll wait upon the Lord and see. He will surely not delay.

The alien.

Has anyone felt alien among the people or culture one belongs to? Being n Kerala right now, I can’t help say that I feel that way. Although I belong to this state, I feel like I don’t belong here. I’m risking people’s wrath and ridicule when I say that because I have heard elders accuse people saying “ He went to Bangalore for some years and now he says he doesn’t belong here.” At the moment I don’t care. I am not shamed, mind you. But I don’t feel like this is my culture or this is the kind of people I want to be identified with. It doesn’t happen when I think of everyone, it just happens when I see the way the administration of the state is carried out, the state of affairs, the attitude of many people, some illogical customs, things which I call narrow-mindedness … I have a list. Many things are good here. At the same time a lot of things frustrate me. I just can’t imagine living here all my life. I envision a multi-cultural environment which is a little more broad-minded, at least, more than here.

This is not a utopian dream for a peaceful society. Just a feeling of alienation. This doesn’t mean that I feel like aI belong to Bangalore hundred percent. I just don’t feel like this is mine. The society around me. This feeling of ownership. Not at all. It’s at a Nadir. The lowest I have ever felt. This doesn’t mean that I don’t like the whole lot,. I like many, respect many and love many more. The set of people where I feel I belong to, feel that heart’s connection to themselves are Malayalees (people at church and youth league).

Standing inside an auto rickshaw

It was raining.
Really bad.
Surprisingly I never got irritated with it.
I got wet.
I was going for a wedding reception.
Had to catch an auto to the venue.
The seats and the driver and the whole machine was wet.
Didn't want to wet my bottom, so I stood in the auto.
Auto-wreck-show.
വെറുതെ

diggin into the world of blogs

It was great reading my pals' blogs on Sweden and their experiences in Norway. You live the life with them through the stories, especially because you can relate to all that they go through. a range of emotions come tumbling down, right from excitement, anxiety, jealousy, happiness, sadness of missing the place and people . . . It's great. Isn't it funny how just words written by someone where across the globe can evoke emotions in a person sitting miles away? That too just words, not even the person talking. An indelible mark by the person, somewhere. In this regard it is indirect, still it play with your emotions. Imagine the power of words when spoken directly. Psychology and social workers talk endlessly about the need to be careful of what one speaks, as it can have an unexpected effect on those listening. Especially children, as they grow up, when their personalities and conscience are being formed.

It's great to sit in a corner of the world and read a blog from among the millions up on the net.

Two becoming one TWO

I met her again. She is married now. I found it somehow comfortable and uncomfortable to see it that way. They both stood in a shop in the forum while I got in.
["You are happy to see that I didn't run away right?" She asked me with a giggle. "He actually was thinking what he would do when someone would come and tell that the girl was not coming!!! Ha ha ha ...," laughed the girl who had given it thoughts to run away.]

They are leaving tomorrow. To a place where she never wanted to go, leaving the girls who loved her in the darkness of a small Indian state where she was working.

"They really were interested to see the kind of work I did and wanted to do more, ya. Good, no? " She said with a twinkle in her eyes.
"You've done a hel lot of work among those people. They need people with a heart like yours, there," I said.
"So I'll get a job, alle?
"What's the question! I'm sure you will."

That was beautiful. She was thinking. And she has changed now. She is changing and she will change for him.

See, I told you she loved him. The girl I have known for 8 years now, wasn't so stone hearted, as wanyone would have thought. And the man is a gentleman. Somehow I picked up some tension and discomfort on his face. May be because he knew that we would be talking about this. But he knew me and my place and always gave a me a place. A perfect gentleman. They are lucky to have each other.

When they told me about their life together in front of that beautiful church 7 years ago, I wasn't shocked as I had doubts already. But when they told me that they had been together for 2 years, THAT shocked me. Well kept secret! At that point, I never expected so many twists and turns in their life. But, today, as then, they always based it in a relationship with the almighty and full of love. Many ups and downs later, the wedding bells rang.

The first wedding which I attended that made me so happy. I've never felt that joy at the end of any other wedding. Two friends of mine, who knew me well and were very good friends of mine - first time in my life.

I am still so happy for you, you guys. God bless you in the overseas (even if the seas roll again) and in the future. Praying for you both.

Two becoming one

"I don't love him. You must think it's funny and want to slap me."
The little girl at the door-step of marriage said.
She once loved him deeply. She was convinced.
Today, I am sure she loves him. But, questions remain.
A new actor appeared on stage. His role wasn't in the script which was written many years ago. But he played his part, a major part, and left. It was devastatnig when he did that though. An unscripted character leaving a delible mark.
The show must go on. "Should it?", she asked me. It was a tough situation.
I said it must. Not because that's what everyone at this point would do.
Because she loved him, deeply. He loves her, beyond words. She loves him, I know.
But she's a little shocked. Life can't be this way. You shouldn't have to chose this much. Losing track of what's happening around.
A hand squeeze. Think about it, pray about it. I'll always be around if you need to talk to someone.
I never condemned her. Somehow. She has a special place.

"Things are better. I feel comfortable around him. he understood when I spoke to him and he said he'll give me time. "
Wonderful.
He's a gentleman. And he deserves a great girl like her. Given the many years of them having been together, it is no surprise that they should reach the page where the wedding bells sound. And that's what happened. As always, he took extra care to make it an unforgettable wedding for the both of them.
I am sure, it will be a happily ever after, with a few fights in between like everyone.
For, "The wind plays the music; for the song of their oneness, God wrote the lyrics."

HEAR, O ISRAEL, CURSED WILL YOU BE!

I STRONGLY AND VEHEMENTLY CONDEMN YOUR ATTACKS ON THE GAZA STRIP, O ISRAEL. YOU HAVE NO REASON TO DO SO AND YOU ARE KILLING FAMILIES. YOU HAVE STOOPED DOWN TO A LEVEL WHERE YOU SEND ROCKETS INTO CROWDED MARKETS AND EVEN UNIVERSITIES. SHAME ON YOU! I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT THE ALMIGHTY IS GOING TO DO WITH YOU, FOR ALL THE CHOSEN RACE TALK. THE PUNISHMENT UPON YOU BE HEAVY AND CURSED. I HOPE THE INNOCENT ONES ARE SAVED BUT ALL OF YOU BEHIND THIS WILL EAT PUNISHMENT HANDED OVER BY THE JUDGEMENT OF THE LORD OF HOSTS.
HOW CAN YOU BE SO HEARTLESS!
AND YOU, THE UNITED STATES, SUPPORTING THIS ATTACK WITH F16S AND ARMS PROVISION, GREATER BE THE PUNISHMENT ON YOU, YOU WARMONGER! IN THE NAME OF HUMANITARIANISM AND DEMOCARCY AND PEACE OU DESTROY NATIONS PERMANENTLY AND LOOT THEM SHAMELESSLY. SHAME ON YOU AND ALL THOSE WHO VOTED FOR YOU.
WAR IS WRONG, WAR IS INHUMAN, WAR IS EVIL AND WAR IS VIOLATION.
ISRAEL, STOP.

Calm before the storm

The sea is calm;
Calmer than usual,
Earlier, when the sky darkens,
And the clouds growl
The sea would rise,
Hoping to wipe them away;
Hoping to mute the noise;
Which turned it turbulent!
Today the sea is calm.
It makes the sailors curious...
The sea can't be so calm.
History has plenty of instances,
To show how men have been fooled
Still...
Could it be?
What does the sea say?
It just flows, sending it's currents to differnt regions;
There is no stopping in it's way.
Big fish, little fish, they all are taking in the calm
Not worried about shelter or quakes,
For the God of the sea has proved powerful
And powerful enought to calm any sea
As ever.

Found a reader

Yes, Google reader is too cool. I used to use My Yahoo, but Google REader is much less cluttered and organises all your feeds properly! You can so so many things with it.
ANother thing it has taught me is to focus on something that you're reading. When it's in your news aggregator like Google Reader, you can focus on what you want to read as you have subscribed to them based on what was interesting to you.

I'm telling you, hadh I had unlimited net connection at home, I would end up in rehab for sure, since I theink there is so many things to do on the net! So many... I'll mkake a list and post it up.
Another idea I have had off late (thanks to Problogger) is to have some focus on the blog you're writig. As of now, it's just too many things here. I'm planning to start one more blog. Sounds exciting to me.

sharing boredom.

boredom comes with great food.
And the food is good still boredom's great
Trekking is fun, but still boredom continues.
So we plan more treks which never happen or get delayed
A morning run was planned, but I overslept.
So He missed his tea and the host is lazy.
It doesn't matter because he spent time in the bathroom reading.
But the grandpa's feeling uneasy coz the trip to the bathroom wasn't worthwhile.
Aww!!Poor him. Hope it works out the next time.
It's time for some biscuits, let me fetch from the tin.
Mmm. the taste of cookies!!never fails you.
Now what?
And, boredom continues...

Special Guest:Uduman

Quick replies from above : You tell me, God II

I'd like to believe that God quickly replied when He bgouhgt me to read Psalm 73 in the daily devotion book called Everyday with Jesus. Most of the answer came by:

Psalms 73

1 A Psalm of Asaph. Truly God is good to the upright, to those who are pure in heart. 2 But as for me, my feet had almost stumbled, my steps had well nigh slipped. 3 For I was envious of the arrogant, when I saw the prosperity of the wicked. 4 For they have no pangs; their bodies are sound and sleek. 5 They are not in trouble as other men are; they are not stricken like other men. 6 Therefore pride is their necklace; violence covers them as a garment. 7 Their eyes swell out with fatness, their hearts overflow with follies. 8 They scoff and speak with malice; loftily they threaten oppression. 9 They set their mouths against the heavens, and their tongue struts through the earth. 10 Therefore the people turn and praise them; and find no fault in them. 11 And they say, "How can God know? Is there knowledge in the Most High?" 12 Behold, these are the wicked; always at ease, they increase in riches. 13 All in vain have I kept my heart clean and washed my hands in innocence. 14 For all the day long I have been stricken, and chastened every morning. 15 If I had said, "I will speak thus," I would have been untrue to the generation of thy children. 16 But when I thought how to understand this, it seemed to me a wearisome task, 17 until I went into the sanctuary of God; then I perceived their end. 18 Truly thou dost set them in slippery places; thou dost make them fall to ruin. 19 How they are destroyed in a moment, swept away utterly by terrors! 20 They are like a dream when one awakes, on awaking you despise their phantoms. 21 When my soul was embittered, when I was pricked in heart, 22 I was stupid and ignorant, I was like a beast toward thee. 23 Nevertheless I am continually with thee; thou dost hold my right hand. 24 Thou dost guide me with thy counsel, and afterward thou wilt receive me to glory. 25 Whom have I in heaven but thee? And there is nothing upon earth that I desire besides thee. 26 My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion for ever. 27 For lo, those who are far from thee shall perish; thou dost put an end to those who are false to thee. 28 But for me it is good to be near God; I have made the Lord GOD my refuge, that I may tell of all thy works.

The Revised Standard Version

... and then Malachi 3:14-18

Malachi 3

3:14 "You have said, 'It is futile to serve God. What did we gain by carrying out his requirements and going about like mourners before the Lord Almighty?

3:15 But now we call the arrogant blessed. Certainly the evildoers prosper, and even those who challenge God escape.'"

3:16 Then those who feared the Lord talked with each other, and the Lord listened and heard. A scroll of remembrance was written in his presence concerning those who feared the Lord and honored his name.

3:17 "They will be mine," says the Lord Almighty, "in the day when I make up my treasured possession. I will spare them, just as in compassion a man spares his son who serves him.

3:18 And you will again see the distinction between the righteous and the wicked, between those who serve God and those who do not.

New International Version

Answers remain. Life so far teaches me that God's too big to understand. On top of that:

Isaiah 55:6-13

8 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the Lord. 9 "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. 10 As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, 11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. 12 You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands. 13 Instead of the thornbush will grow the pine tree, and instead of briers the myrtle will grow. This will be for the Lord's renown, for an everlasting sign, which will not be destroyed."

And then:

1Co 2:9 -
6 We do, however, speak a message of wisdom among the mature, but not the wisdom of this age or of the rulers of this age, who are coming to nothing. 7 No, we speak of God's secret wisdom, a wisdom that has been hidden and that God destined for our glory before time began. 8 None of the rulers of this age understood it, for if they had, they would not have crucified the Lord of glory. 9 However, as it is written: "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him"-- 10 but God has revealed it to us by his Spirit. The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God. 11 For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the man's spirit within him? In the same way no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God.



Well, well wel, Mr. God. Lots of answers, eh?

And then there's this song by Hillsongs written by Mia Fieldes/Hillsong Publishing

All for love a Father gave.. For only love could make a way... All for love the heavens cried.. For love was crucified.
Oh, how many times have I broken your heart... But still you forgive if only I ask..
And how many times have you heard me pray..Draw near to me..


And forgiveness comes when one

Mt 6:12

Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.

So...
Hmmm... it's tough, God.
2Co 12:9

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

Alright. As you say. I choose to trust.

You tell me, God.

Living a Chrsitian life is so hard. Very, very hard.

On top of that God expects everyone to be like him. And that is not possible. Still St.Paul insists that we always strive to do so.

Why would anyone ever be a Christian if it is so tough? Why would anyone want to believe Jesus is the Saviour and accept him in their heart if most of the things that are going to happen in Christian life is tough? Things like forgiving, forgiving and forgetting, reconciliation, loving in spite of being hurt, loving the person who hurt you, loving another person as much as you love yourself, including your emeny (if you have one). And when troubles come Jesus doesn't readily, or otherwise appear and hold your hand. You are expected to believe that He never leaves you because you are His own creation and "a masterpiece made to do good works." (Eph 2:10)
Do You have an answer , God? Yes, there is peace that passeth all understanding. There is the love through people, there is the grace to go through any trouble (at the end of which you wonder how did I even survive?), there are other loving people, yes, there are all the blessings in the form of a nice house good food, great youth group and friends there, great books to read, nice family, email and internet, music and all of it, paani puri...hmmm...
I have all that too, eh? Yes, I'd like to still complain because I don't know why you bring about trouble in the form of following all that You want me to do. Can't you make life just perfect as it is promised to be in heaven?Why not make it good for all? And sit back an relax? You wouldn't even have to listen to all those prayers and music people offer You. Why all that from ol' sinful earth? Why not make it clean with a Word, just like you created heaven and earth? Why do You bring trouble upon yourself? Why make Yourself sad by seeing all thr trouble of the people You created? Why let them be exploited? Why not just banish Satan and evil and make it non-existent? What are you doing there? Why so much time for deliverance? Trust, faith, yes. But why? Eh?

The bride

There he stood clean shaven, wearing his glasses.
"You look 'decent'!",I told him
"Yeah, Seniors and ragging... Come she's standing there near the car."
We walked towards the bride to be who was bending into the car searching for the wedding invites on the back seat.
"Can't find it, where did it go?!" She asked herself after saying hi.

We talked for quite some time about her future plans, life and studies in architecture, post marriage travel plans, Patch's college life and the good food he gets there (Ice creams, non-veg everyday...). We talked like we had always met up to talk for years, yet it was just the 5th time I had met her in 2 years. A person who just needed to know whether I, a big brother, would be around, to stay back late for a common programme for her sister to be part of it. Phone calls ringing with enquiries out of responsibility and concern for her young one. A person with a lot of responsibility in the form of studies, work, a house, a sister, personal life, yet very small in stature. She was going to step into another life, becoming a bride and a wife. I could see the child in her yes looking at me as she spoke. Even Patch seemed older to her. But there was an exuding confidence which was nearly shining as she spoke about the travel plans to Goa, Gulf, Trivandrum, Bangalore and back. She was brimming with expectation, like any happy bride-to-be.

God bless!

They gave me a fabulously crafter wedding invitation, which was ellaborately designed. And off went the brother and sister. Patch said he'll call when he gets a new number, as he'd lost his phone...

Everything seemed so unreal and like a dream. The way I was connected to those 2 two people can't be explained. Yet they have a significant impact on me.
And Patch will call when he gets the new number.

I am sleepy. No more black coffee. At least for a couple of days

It's nearly 4 pm and I am very very very sleepy. There is a class which I love attending, but I don't think I will be up the whole time, because my eyes are already feeling heavy.
I will watch Kung-fu Panda when I get home. I am tired because I sat up like an idiotchanging the colour of fonts within a word in my powerpoint presentation slides. That went on til 4 am.
No wonder.

As I do when I sit up late, I asked Aunty for some coffee so that I could stay up. Drank the whole flask over the night and all that balck coffee is rumbling in my stomach. It's a burnt up feeling. Nothing left in the stomach. The Black Coffee washed it all away, away, away...

What a wonder. 12 hours ago I was sitting in front of a borrowed lap top working slides and 12 hours later, still in front of a computer.
I feel like having a coffee now.

Wonder why I even wrote this post.

Rock On : Some layers and their meaning

Image courtesy: http://rockon.bigadda.com/cast-crew.html

ROCK ON: My part of the movie

Last night I watched ‘Rock On’, a Hindi film on life surrounding music, how music figures in and out, in different lives and different circumstances.

I loved the part of the movie where Joe, the lead guitarist’s and his wife’s life. I still feel she a had a reason to be displeased with his choice to go back and practice with the band, when he had an offer to do something that would bring up the family from the tight financial state and give a future for their son. His wife had made compromises for ten years and he still did not have a proper job and I feel it was his responsibility to take up the job, which she had laboriously arranged. She had good reason to go and talk to Aditya, who was in a well off state and had nothing to lose whether they got back as a band to play or not.

But the catch comes when Rob, who’s wish is to have a bang back as a band together, with his quickly deteriorating state due to fore brain tumour looms large. But what about ten years of Joe’s wife’s life? Where’s his responsibility, Dharma, purpose? Does it altogether meet at some point?

The movie has a thread regarding making compromises in life, running throughout the movie. Who can compromise? Whose compromise is valued? Does someone’s compromise matter in front of your desires? Does family come first or ambition? Some might say both can go hand in hand. The question, then, would be whose hands they are. Because unlike in movies, real life need not make circumstances coincide with each other so easily. Each one has his own situation and circumstance. Each one is in a place where He/she has been put in. It’s up to you to do your best in that circumstances, in such a way that your everyone is able to compromise on some things and hold on to some things. How much of each of that, is something there is no set answer to. That needs to be figured out by the human beings, who have equal rights, involved.

To complicate it further, one could try to find out where love fits in to this. Can love wipe away all the things lost by compromise? Can the compromise be overcome/ shadowed by love? What about years of compromise? So what, then, are relationships all about? Which makes the compromise? How much should /can/ must each partner compromise? Can they decide it in/through love? Really? Or do you just let life take over and let it flow? Do I sense apathy there?

The movie is multi-layered and each aspect could generate thousands of questions and that is what I like about it.

Walking on faith, disappointment and anger in the crunch

When the world economy went on a crunch, surprisingly its reflected in my life too.
For over a month, I had no money of my own. The worst economic crunch that had hit me. Every single day was a walk of faith. No paani puri, not even coffee, because you would be functioning on borrowed money. There would be not single currency note in my wallet. The function of the wallet was redefined to be a holder of identity cards, a bus pass and and ATM card with no money in the account, besides the driving license which was grossly obese compared to its wallet mates.
I would walk praying to God asking if it was a punishment. I would pray for money to land from somewhere. Sometimes, he budged. But after that grace period, I slumped backed in to economic depression.
I stopped the occassional Guava outside the college though I would be hungry. I would not have a coffee in between the long boring hours of 'Assessment', because 4 bucks began to feel like luxuory.
Friends? Yes, Chinpol, was my lender but there was a limit to which I would ask her, and she is the only one I am comfortable to ask. Earlier it was my true friend Swati who's pursuing her management studies in an old Portuguese colony. She's not around. The point is that I don't like being in debt. But when it comes to photocopying notes and whole text books, which would cost a bomb in in actually buying the original book, money was needed and that's when I would turn to Chinpol. She would never act weird.
Yes, I have a huge discomfort when it comes to asking for money. Only because I don't want to be begging people.
And the last thing I want to hear at that moment would be: "You want cash? I'll give you. "
No thanks.
I haven't reached that stage yet. I will let you know when I start begging.

And these thoughts would sometimes invade my mind like the whites who invaded native Indian settlements in America. It would end up in a battle. These battles would be in the mind, while I'm in the class, or on my walks back home from the bus, or when somebody presses the wrong button during a conversation.

I don't want to go through this again. It is a painful. To me it is shameful.
And I don't like hidden favours. I hate them and they make me feel even more undignified and like a refugee in a foreign land.
Not to bad mouth my parents. There is a limit to which they can send every month. And when that is over and there are more legitimate and mostly unforeseen circumstances, this is the story. I don't want to tell them. Even if I did, I'll feel bad. Not like there was much to send. Just for the basic needs. Thank you, you guys. And I hate some aunties who press money into your hands when no one is looking, making me feel like dignified charity acceptance.

The things I learnt from the economic crunch are many:
1. Money plays quite a big role in my life. I'm surprised at how much I let that control me.
I learnt to keep money from going beyond the place it deserves in my life.
2. When you have absolutely no money, this time, and when you pray is when you don't get any diseases which would entail huge hospital bills; you don't meet with accidents; you don't have to pay for a burnt house or buy new clothes due to some disaster.
You just learn to live on faith and be happy with what you have.
3. Count your blessings. I am way better off than the children on the streets with food to eat and food available three times a day. What if I can't have a coffee? I have lunch packet, which most of them don't have. Now that's luxuorious. I'm feeling guilty already.
4. There are somethings in life you just can't tell people about, however close you are. It could be money or any such thing. I didn't feel like telling anyone except my brother (who shares the crunch with me) and God, that time. Now I'm out of it and that I have changed my perspectives, I can tell anyone.
It was hell of an experience. Literally.
5. You could have loads of books, a CD player, good shoes, plenty of clothes, three times food a day, great friends, close family, musical abilities, and still not have a single penny in your pocket, for weeks on end. Nobody will ever come to know.
I'm glad that no one did at that time, because I just didn't want to.
6. I've learn that the few coins one spends on stuff on the road once in a while can be a big amount at the end of the month.
7. Trust God. What he teaches you through experience is never learn by speaking, hearing, reading.
It's learnt only through living. He cares, He provides, He protects.
8. You cannot live without the help of others no matter how independent you want to be.

How many more of these lessons are left to learn in life?
I'd rather live them than read about them.



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Pic courtesy :
1. http://www.onelostcoin.org/coinimg/coin2.jpg
2. http://www.freefoto.com/images/04/28/04_28_22---One-Penny-Coin_web.jpg

The afternoon I longed for: But it's the a wrong place.

I longed for a free afternoon where I could sit and mail my friends or read books on psycho- therapy.
I got it.
But I was at the wrong place.